Fed up with Java, switching to a new language

I’ve had it with Java, too much technology to learn with Unit testing, ORM, IoC, AOP, and SOA, not to mention static typing and waiting to compile. That’s why as of right now I’m a converted .BAT programmer and here’s why:

1. .BAT is already installed on 90+% of the computers in the world
2. .BAT supports dynamic typing (set FOO=x, set FOO=1)
3. .BAT is interpreted, no build (and waiting) necessary to run my code
4. .BAT is modular and extendable (FOO.BAT can call BAR.BAT)
5. .BAT supports a variable number of arguments to other .BAT modules (BAR.BAT 1 2 3 4 5 6 7)
6. .BAT has more IDE’s than any other language (although my favorite is Notepad)
7. The OS has built in refactoring support allowing me to move and rename my .BAT modules without starting up my favoriate IDE (Notepad)
8. .BAT is cross-platform (DOS, Windows 3.1, Windows 95, Windows 98, ME, 2000, XP, 2003)
9. .BAT supports running from a GUI by double clicking on it or using it from the command line
10. .BAT makes accessing environment variables easy so I can move most configuration out of my .BAT module
11. .BAT has built in debugging and logging with PAUSE and ECHO

Things I’m hoping to see in the next release of .BAT (shipping with Longhorn)

1. Improved ODBC driver support in .BAT
2. Improved regular expression support (although their * and ? filesystem regex support is already the best in the business)

I only wish I’d seen the light sooner before I wasted the better part of a decade on Java!

21 Responses to “Fed up with Java, switching to a new language”

  1. Steve Prentice Says:

    All laughing aside, I’ve seen way too many Java programs that have been written to tackle things that *should* have been written in one shell language or another…bash, bat, or whatever.

    Case in point, a recent command line interpreter that I had to work on weighed in at over 10K java lines of code. The bash replacement was 50 lines. Hmm.

  2. John Stone Says:

    BAT rocks! I’m going to make this required reading for any new system admin I hire that comes in bragging about their special skills with VBscript.

  3. Way cool Says:

    BAT allows easy calling of OS-specific functionality. You can call any command line utilities in the operating system.

    You can extend BAT in C or almost any other language.

    BAT contains a built in interpreter your program’s users can use for scripting! Just call command.com or cmd.exe from your BAT file, and the powerful interpreter appears in all it’s glory!

    BAT comes bundled with a powerful text entry feature! Unlike editing controls found in other programming languages, this is simple to use. Just call

    COPY CON file-name.txt

  4. Peter Blue Says:

    When I used Windows, I used a .BAT program (running XCopy) to auto backup all my new (or changed) files onto another hard drive each time Windows was started. Who needs expensive backup software ?

  5. peter blue is special Says:

    My. Aren’t you clever Peter Blue

  6. J Says:

    Grab yourself some GTK-Server and you can even write interactive GUI programs:

    http://www.gtk-server.org/index.html

  7. Ryan Says:

    You forgot to include the percentages on the parameters - see quake.bat:

    quake.exe %1 %2 %3 %4 %5 %6

    Also, don’t forget the robust commenting system via REM

  8. grulos Says:

    BAT io: copy readme.txt lpt1:

    can you imagine the possibilities?

  9. Ron Says:

    Actually, if you used 4NT from JPSoft (I’m not affiliated but I am a happy user), you have excellent regular expression support. It also has block- structured IF statements and all kinds of new goodies that Java will NEVER support.

  10. Koston Says:

    Also, don’t forget the fact that one of the system default startup files is a .BAT script.

  11. cyber_rigger Says:

    So, ROM basic’s not good enough for you?

    :^)

    I would rather use a Linux shell myself.

  12. cyber_rigger Says:

    “DOS, Windows 3.1, Windows 95, Windows 98, ME, 2000, XP, 2003″,

    IMO, does NOT mean “crossplatform”.

  13. Mahdi Says:

    LOL

  14. AJ Says:

    cyber_rigger, perhaps we should start an open-source project to create a linux implementation of .BAT? Let us spread the goodness of .BAT to the world! OSX.BAT, anyone?

  15. sebsauvage Says:

    How about Python ?

    It has all the feature you mentioned, and it’s crossplatform.
    (I wrote webGobbler, and it runs without any change on Windows, Linux, MacOS X, …)

    It’s a free (as in speech) language and comes with batteries included.

    http://python.org

  16. Paul Henman Says:

    BAT - the poor-man’s Bourne shell :)

  17. Paul, Kerri and The Boys » Blog Archive » Neat new feature Says:

    [...] By complete fluke (I was replying to “Fed up with Java, switching to a new language” - it’s funny) and discovered a “subscribe” option. A quick Google search later and I found the Subscribe to Comments 2.0 plugin for WordPress. It’s installed now, so all you have to do is select the tick-box (aka checkbox) and comments posted against your comment will be emailed to you! There’s even an option to “unsubscribe” if/when you want to turn this off. [...]

  18. Todd Huss’ blog » Blog Archive » MacBook Pro first impressions and why I switched Says:

    [...] Cons: It has the crappiest command line and scripting language out there, see my hunor piece I titled Fed up with Java, switching to .BAT for a little tongue in cheek! I always end up installing Cygwin to develop on a Windows machine and while Cygwin works really well, some bash scripts of downloaded software don’t work out of the box and even in Cygwin it shows through from time to time that you’re running on a non Unix platform. [...]

  19. Todd Huss’ blog » Blog Archive » Differences between Digg and Reddit Says:

    [...] I wrote a tongue in cheek humor piece on April fools day last year about ditching Java and switching to .BAT. Earlier this year it hit the front page of Reddit which was very exciting since my little server stood up to the pounding pretty well. Then more recently it hit the front page of Digg (but only briefly). Talk about two totally different experiences! [...]

  20. crysfel Says:

    hahahahahahhaha LOL…. this is so fun!!! hehehehhehe

  21. Paul Henman - find me at henman.ca » Blog Archive » Neat new feature Says:

    [...] complete fluke (I was replying to “Fed up with Java, switching to a new language” - it’s funny) and discovered a “subscribe” option. A quick Google search [...]

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